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Two Dorks Discuss The Rose Bowl

by Wendi // January 2, 2012

Dork #1: Myself

Dork #2: Ann Imig, star of stage, screen and the hilarious blog AnnsRants.

The Occasion: The 2012 Rose Bowl match-up between the amazingly talented Oregon Ducks who proudly boast me and the guy who played Dr. Johnny Fever as distinguished alumni and the (cough) Wisconsin Badgers whose alumni include Ann and some semi-professional jugglers.

Important Note: The sports knowledge and inside-football talk between us here is very high-level, so you may need to consult ESPN.com or ask a clerk at The Foot Locker to explain it to you later. It’s really amazing that we don’t have our own sports talk radio show by now. I think it’s because we’re too hot to be taken seriously.

Anyway, here we go:

Later, we tried to make a bet about whose team would win, but then we got into a fight about how much cuter the Duck’s costumes are than the Badger’s costumes and I don’t know what happened after that, but now I have to give Ann $100 and my plastic duck lip whistle and that pisses me off because she doesn’t even know the first thing about quacking.

But I do. Which is why if the Ducks win, I plan on calling her later and leaving a 10-minute long version of “American Pie” done in duck quacks on her voicemail. I’m putting on Chapstick right now in preparation.

GO DUCKS!

 

 

 

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Comments

  1. Ann says:
    January 2, 2012 at 4:03 pm

    I’m impressed that you got all the way through that without even one honey badger reference.

    –Sweetums.

  2. The Flying Chalupa says:
    January 2, 2012 at 4:22 pm

    And here I was thinking you were discussing the Rose Bowl PARADE.

    I can’t believe you all watch football.

    Says the girl with the NHL Winter Classic Game on.

  3. Lisa Rae @ smacksy says:
    January 2, 2012 at 4:29 pm

    I love you, Wetland Creatures.

  4. Cassie says:
    January 2, 2012 at 5:49 pm

    Skinny jeans with webbed feet BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Ah god, I am DYING laughing!

  5. anna says:
    January 2, 2012 at 6:19 pm

    i have never understood sportsball myself, so i am totally impressed with anyone who does.

  6. Liz @ PeaceLoveGuac says:
    January 2, 2012 at 8:52 pm

    Two words for y’all: hi larious.

  7. Invader_Stu says:
    January 3, 2012 at 3:11 am

    I think I just realized I understand even less about sports then I thought

  8. Becky Rice says:
    January 3, 2012 at 6:27 am

    Just tell me your husband didn’t have to watch the game from Crumb Couch.

  9. Nancy Davis Kho says:
    January 3, 2012 at 9:18 am

    I was feeling bad that I missed the entire game because I was the putz who said “girls, does anyone need new shoes before school starts again tomorrow?” and was immediately trapped at the mall for 2.5 hours. Now, not feeling so bad.

    They had some cute sandals at Aerosoles for the webbed of feet, btw.

  10. dusty earth mother says:
    January 3, 2012 at 11:07 am

    Laughing Out Loud. Refuse to use the acronym, but I really was, so whaddya do?

  11. Tracy says:
    January 3, 2012 at 12:27 pm

    I’m such a dork I don’t even know what the Rose Bowl IS, ok? (I’m an NFL girl.)

    I will say this: I just looked it up and Oregon’s uniforms are WAY cuter. Also? Portland is super cool, so Oregon wins.

  12. Mauigirl says:
    January 3, 2012 at 4:47 pm

    Oh Wendi, you do “quack” me up!! 🙂

  13. the mama bird diaries says:
    January 3, 2012 at 8:20 pm

    What the f is going on? I don’t even know what sport you guys are talking about.

  14. Julia says:
    January 3, 2012 at 8:29 pm

    Judging from the score, I’m guessing that both teams, in a fit of practicality, decided to save money and bring only their offense teams….but on to more important things:

    Wendi, for losing the bet, she should have to replace her answering machine message with your serenade.

  15. Libby says:
    January 3, 2012 at 9:13 pm

    My college didn’t have enough money for an animal mascot. We just had “Sticky” the stick. I mean, until the whole copyright infringement thing…

  16. Traci says:
    January 4, 2012 at 6:18 am

    OMG! Priceless conversation. (I’m stopping in from the Mama Bird Diaries.)

  17. tracy@sellabitmum says:
    January 4, 2012 at 6:30 am

    I get so turned on when mom bloggers talk sports.

  18. julie gardner says:
    January 4, 2012 at 12:48 pm

    I heard Don Mc Clean stole your idea and it’s gone viral on YouTube.

    Better lawyer up, sister.

    Those skinny jeans won’t pay for themselves.

  19. Ninja Mom says:
    January 5, 2012 at 9:05 am

    You should host a sports-trash-talk online seminar. I’ll bring Chapstick. Online Chapstick, obviously.

  20. Megan (Best of Fates) says:
    January 5, 2012 at 5:36 pm

    Now all I can picture is a duck in jeans. Which, now that I’ve pondered it, would make quite an amusing avatar.

  21. Gretchen says:
    January 7, 2012 at 1:29 pm

    You are funny, woman. If you want, I will send you Jude’s Long Island Ducks plastic quacker lips, which make an extremely loud and unpleasant duck quacking noise when blown into by the 8-year old ad nauseum. No really, I will. Just send me your address and they are in the mail. BTW, did you sell the couch?

  22. Alexandra says:
    January 9, 2012 at 7:31 am

    Funny women.

    I am so dang lucky to know funny women.

    Thanks for the smiles.

  23. Laura says:
    February 13, 2012 at 9:34 am

    DUDE, how do you get your contact pictures to show on your texts???

    Also- Hilarious.

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