What’s about the dumbest thing you can do, if you’re me, and you finally get your two bathroom remodels done, finally get the kids back in school and you can once again relax and concentrate on writing?
Well, it’s probably this:
In case you don’t follow me on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, Pinterest, Neighborhood Watch, Words With Friends, Grindr and Tinder, where I’ve posted about a billion pictures since Friday night, this is our new addition, Teddy!
Yes, I know I already have a son named Jack and now all I need is a fish named Bobby and my house will become the Kennedy Compound Revisited. But come on–he’s a total Teddy. Just look at that widdle face.
Teddy is half poodle, half Bichon Frise, which makes him an unfortunately named hybrid called a “BichyPoo.” (Although, it’s been pointed out to me that “PooBich” is way worse, while also being an excellent name for a new BRAVO TV show.) (And don’t even bother trademarking it because I already did.)
After looking and looking at animal shelters for a hypoallergenic dog for a long time, and after being appalled at the $3,500 price tag that most breeders charge for Labradoodles, etc., I finally found Teddy listed in the newspaper. His owners aren’t professional breeders, per se. More like hobbyists who let their own dogs go to town one wild summer night and then they never cleaned their house again and just wrote a classified ad. I don’t know, I don’t want to think about that too much. Let’s pretend Teddy was born in a French chateau surrounded by harpists.
At any rate, he’s very healthy, sweet and smart and loves people like a maniac who always has GREAT NEWS to share. See? Awwww.
I haven’t lived with a dog in almost 30 years, my husband has never had a puppy, and the boys are used to cats that just sort of do their own thing and don’t need special equipment like pee pads, so let me just say that it’s been a crazy three days. However, the good news is that Teddy has slept every night for 8-10 hours, accident free, in his crate. That’s a big plus. Another big plus is that now I can just throw up a picture of his cuteness whenever I’m tired of writing:
I just took a nap while you were looking at that.
Of course the big question is, “What do the cats think?” and the big answer is, “Not much.” However, they hid for the first day only, and now they are very curious about this gross new thing that slurps water like some kind of animal. (There’s a high likelihood that they think he’s their old nemesis, the Furby.) Both Lola and Virgil regularly hiss at Teddy, but there hasn’t been any chasing or swiping or any “Good God, I’m calling the authorities, woman. Now you’ve gone TOO FAR. TOO FAR, we say!” declarations from Feline Nation yet.
Teddy is smart enough to give them both a wide berth, so I think we’ll be fine fairly soon with the three pets. They probably won’t ever truly love one another, but hopefully they’ll have a peaceful co-existence and reach an understanding. Like Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes did before the lawyers got involved. Here’s Lola investigating the creepy snorting thing in its cage:
She’s all, “When I was that age, I slept behind the refrigerator like a lady.“
I will say that working today has been a bit of a struggle, so I may be behind on things for a few days. Here’s Teddy after I pulled him out of my bag of recycled paper and removed the tin can from his mouth. At least he looks a little contrite. And obviously I will be feeding him all of the paperwork I get from the PTO from now on.
But of course, by far, the best part about having a puppy is how thrilled he is each and every time he sees me. It’s like having a smitten toddler all over again. “That lady! It’s that lady! Oh, my gosh, how I love that lady! The lady is here!” Chris brought him home a doggy bed last night and I thought Teddy’s head would explode. Dogs are definitely more in the “show” rather than “tell” category when it comes to emotion. Cats, of course, are in the “You brought me a gift? Yawn. I’ll take a look after I’m done licking myself for three hours” category.
And now, because I am getting tired of writing and someone needs another potty break, I will bid you all adieu with another Teddy pic:
He’s available to be pet sat any time. ANY TIME AT ALL.
Is this too many pictures? I don’t care.
Well, you know I already love him. That face! Those paws! So sweet. Congratulations!
He is SO CUTE. I love him. We got a tiny wittle puppy a month ago and I can almost finally get things done. When I’m not taking a million pictures of her.
FeeBee keeps following the kittens around with her toys in her mouth like she’s saying, “Look what I have! Look what I have!”
The kittens remain unimpressed.
Biggest parenting mistake I’ve made in 12 years – letting my daughter see your FB update with a picture of THAT DOG. For 3 days that’s all she has talked about. I mean, I even offered her a trip to Paris if it means we DON’T have to get a dog.
Signed,
Cat Person with a disgruntled and dog-less tween
P.S. He is cute, dammit.
He is adorable! When will he grow to normal size?
If Bravo doesn’t call you right away to purchase those naming rights, they are fools. But then, they air stuff like “Extreme Guide to Parenting”, so maybe their fool status is already a done deal.
I’m anxiously awaiting your appearance on “Real Housewives of Austin”.
That damn dog is so cute that it’s putting me in a diabetic coma. How big will he get? He looks like snack sized treat for my 70lb moose of a dog.
Between the puppy and the wine room, I might just have to hang out at your house. After he’s housebroken. I’ll be waiting for that announcement.
Wow, you are a glutton for punishment. But a cute punisher he is . . . wait that sounds weird. Congratulations on all that cuteness!
I saw your twitter post but have not had a chance to congratulate! Welcome to the family Teddy, you picked a great family to be part of. The boys will be your best friends for years to come. Lola and Virgil will eventually be your friends, I THINK!
So. Unbelievably. Cute. My nine-year-old is reading this with me, and you’d better guard that dog, because she looooooooves him! (But seriously, congratulations. I look forward to reading more about how the cats deal with him.)
Teddy is cute – that is just a fact. Anyone who would prefer to see is picture of a kitten over Teddy is just wrong, like Ted Cruz-wrong. Having a family dog is an all-American experience and if you have not read My Dog Skip by Willie Morris, this is the time to do so. Just watch out for the ending of the book. Also, pay close attention to all fine leather goods. I am still mourning a Ralph Lauren sandal that my first dog mistook for a rawhide. (Mary Dell)
Congratulations, Wendi!! There’s nothing quite like being ADORED by your dog, ‘specially when he’s the last baby in the house (by like 15 years-gulp-). You’re gonna love it — but do beware of the shoe fetish thing — it’ll pass, but keep leather off the floor for maybe another year or two!
Teddy is perfect!
I got our little Bichon puppy in December, after a horrible and crippling bout with depression last fall. Not really a good idea for an overwhelmed and depressed person, adding a puppy to the mix, but after the original “Crap! What did I do?” adjustment period, it’s been great. It is true, though–they take a lot of your time (even without the pictures). Teddy is darling!
He’s a delicious little muppet. I love him.
One rule of thumb on puppies… Do not., under any circumstances, let him put his mouth on you or any other human. Give him a washcloth to chew on. This is one of the best tips I was ever given. The premise behind it is.. if they never have their teeth on you, when accidentally startled, they are less likely to fear bite. Trust me on this one. Not to mention while you love him more and more each day, the puppy teeth have the reverse effect. You will thank Jesus when they are gone.. Also,if you want to bond with him, put a collar on him and attach a leash to your belt so he has to go wherever you go. This is supposed to be for 2 weeks. I did it for 3 days and my son swears that if I had done it any longer our dog would have just jumped on my back every time I got up to go anywhere. Take him EVERYWHERE with you so he will be properly socialized. Somehow I cannot see that being a problem (undersocialized pet) . Your new best friend for the next 15+ years has such a sweet fuzz face. I am a tad jealous.. being dogless for about 3 years now.
That dog does not take a bad picture.
Also, you must check out Mona Pants on Facebook.. Jazzhands is my favorite. Be sure to get talking pet ..because I could see Teddy easily giving Mona Pants a run for her money. They could be best friends for sure. Mona Pants is the Boston Terrier so be sure you look at her Videos first. My best to you.
I got my own paperwork chewer over here! Aren’t they the best?!
Oh, he is just ADORABLE!! Congratulations!
I am not a dog person, but I have to say that is one adorable puppy.
I adopted our first dog from an accidental breeder much like you did…when I took him to get groomed the lady was all, “well congratulations, you’ve got yourself a puppy mill puppy.”
I was so pleased to learn I had rescued our puppy from a puppy mill that I tipped her extra!! So now when people ask where he came from I just say he’s a rescue. They always seem thrilled with me about that.
Teddy is adorable!! Share as many pictures as your heart desires, I never get tired of them and this time goes by so fast. Treasure every moment.
He is SOOOO CUTE.
Also, better you than me.
I got my puppy ten years ago and I’m still exhausted. She, however, is not.
He’s adorable!
Please please please, savour and relish the fact that your puppy sleeps. Mine didn’t sleep in more than two-hour stretches for the first three weeks we had him. SO TIRED ALL THE TIME.
Omg, staaahhhhp! How is it even possible for something that cute too exist? Get your ass to Cafe Press and make me a calendar of that little man!
He looks just like my poodle-schnauzer mix, Bonnie! Beware…they’re too smart for their own good, and they’ll steal your bacon.
Aren’t hypoallergenic dogs the best? Yeah, until you have to spend $100o a year on haircuts, but I guess that’s the price you pay for not having a fur flurry on your wood floors.
I got the email notification about this post on my phone the other day , the photos didn’t show up, so I had to come back to the website to see them. And I am thoroughly disgusted with you Wendi, there are entirely TOO FEW of them. Teddy is that awesomely cute. How do you get anything done with that little preciousness in your life?
Gaaahhhhh, I have a crush on Teddy.