This post and sweepstakes are sponsored by Capital One.
This week has been a real gift to me because I had the opportunity to do a few fun things involving gifts. Unfortunately, none of the gifts were for me. Well, unless you count the decorative ribbon my cat Lola ate, digested for a few hours, then threw up under my desk so I’d step in it with bare feet. Which still makes her a better gift giver than 90% of the Secret Santas I’ve ever had.
Anyway, I’ve been laughing all week at your comments telling me your worst gift wrap experiences. They make me feel a lot better about how bad I am at wrapping presents and have also given me many new ideas. Mostly this one: duct tape. WHY ARE YOU CRYING, KIDS? CAN’T YOU OPEN THAT PACKAGE? DON’T YOU HAVE A JACKKNIFE HANDY? I might have to do a little shopping at Home Depot to make Christmas morning more entertaining.
Speaking of mornings, this Thursday my friend Lauren Bayne of MILK and I appeared on Good Day Austin on Fox7 and led the anchors in a Gift Wrap challenge. I thought that putting festive bows on our heads was a brilliant idea at the time, but my mom later reminded me that one of our North Dakota relatives used to do that on a regular basis. Her name was something like Weird Cousin Catherine and she didn’t get invited out much. Here we are on air:
The cameraman thought we were hilarious, but he might have been on a little summin’ summin’ that morning. (Just my opinion. Don’t make him take a urine test, Fox.)
All of that excitement led up to the big event today at the Barton Creek mall where Lauren and I were each given cordless microphones. Yep—imagine being the only two people at the mall with microphones. It’s like you’re the President/LL Cool J/Bob Barker all at the same time.
Here are just a few things we may have done:
—Sang Tiffany’s “I Think We’re Alone Now.” Twice. Surprisingly, this wasn’t very appreciated by the crowd.
—Announced that I studied the piccolo at Julliard, but gave up my musical career after a tongue accident with farm equipment
—Said “That’s what she said” when I really shouldn’t have said “That’s what she said”
—Harassed the men coming in and out of the mall who were carrying rolling suitcases because seriously, who does that? NEVER GO ON A DATE WITH A MAN WHO BRINGS A SUITCASE.
—Made enemies with the guy working the cake pop booth who did not like us even though we told him he resembled Paul Blart Mall Cop which, hello, might be a compliment to some people I’ve never met.
We also emceed the Quicksilver Gift Wrap Competition where people wrapped things like Major Awards and Hamburgers of the Past:
Then Lauren got crazy and decided to wrap the hottest toy at the mall:
I look like something from Project Runway: The Moron Challenge. But it’s slimming, right? Plus silver is very trendy this year.
If you’re in Austin, be sure to go to the Capital One Quicksilver wrapping truck tomorrow, Saturday the 14th, at the Arboretum at Great Hills. Take anything you want to be wrapped and they’ll do it happily. The packages looked amazing today and everyone is very helpful.
And now for the randomly chosen out of the comments on my last post $100 Simon Mall Gift Card winner: Jenn at Something Clever 2.0! Congratulations!
Can you unwrap me now, Lauren?