My kids became obsessed with cats last summer. It began one super hot day when I’d run out of ideas to keep them busy and desperately drove us to PetSmart because they have air conditioning and clean restrooms. I figured we’d look at the fish, pet a gerbil, avoid the people buying mice to feed to their snakes and we’d be out in 15 minutes. But then the boys discovered the store’s cat adoption area where they could look at kittens through a big window and suddenly, we were there three times a week. We’d become Cat Stalkers.
If the adoption volunteer working that day was nice, she’d take pity on the two little faces pushed against the glass and let them into the back area where they could play with five or six kittens at a time. I’d sit on a bag of dog food and watch as they waved sparkly cat toys and laughed delightedly at the little furballs dive bombing their feet. Inevitably, the volunteer would then ask us if we were ready to take one home.
“Sorry,” the boys would say, “but our 19-year-old cat Miss Dickens has to die first. And mommy says she’s not even close to throwing in the towel and meeting her maker.”
Miss Dickens’ advanced age is definitely the reason why the boys loved playing with the kittens. They were completely shocked to see cats that didn’t just sleep and eat all day, as well as cats that actually ran and jumped and had energy. “Wow!” Jack yelled when he saw a tabby sprint across the play area, “this place has cats that MOVE! I didn’t know that cats MOVED!”
After a while, the volunteers seemed to get a little irritated with our permanent Looky Loo status, so we had to switch it up. I started driving us to pet stores in other parts of town. Stores where we didn’t know anyone. Stores where tattooed bald guys in wife beaters walked the aisles with frothing pit bulls tugging at their leashes and teenagers tried to buy fish with Chuck E. Cheese tokens. But despite the rough clientele, the boys still loved it. Not only did they get to play with sweet kittens, they also learned how to say, “¡Qué gatito más mono!” (“What a cute kitten!”) from a nice volunteer. Which is a lot more than most kids learn during summer vacation.
My husband and I know it’s not easy for the boys to walk away from the kittens, so we’re very proud of them for understanding that we need to wait until Miss Dickens is no longer with us. Sometimes I think that she could maybe handle a cute, new interloper, but my instincts tell me that it’d probably be more like All About Eve with Miss Dickens as Bette Davis screeching, “Fasten your seat belts, it’s going to be a bumpy night, beeyotch!” while new kitten Eve hungrily eyes Dickens’ cushy spot next to my laptop. And lord knows we don’t need that drama.
We’ve cut back on our kitten visits since school started, and I’ve also told the boys to try to enjoy their geriatric cat as much as possible. They can pet her, feed her and help her when she wanders into a room and starts yowling because she forgets where she is and doesn’t want to miss her Bingo game. Of course I know that’s not as exciting as taking care of an adorable, little kitten, but still. It’s teaching them compassion, patience and kindness. As well as how to take care of me in 30 years.
The boys will get their kittens some day. But for now, we’ll just be happy smiling at them through the window. And waiting.
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MORE CAT NEWS: My very good friends Marinka and Paul (who is an award-winning filmmaker I worked with at Warner Bros. and who I had all to myself before Marinka blatantly stole him, but that’s another story) have just published the perfect book for all cat-crazy kids. It’s called Wanted: Cat and it’s really, really funny and wonderful. I’m SO proud of them for doing this and ask you all to buy five copies each. (OK, two, if you’re on a budget.) Please be sure to take a look at the book and also their very cool website that even features Miss Dickens!
Also, I went to a Cat Fancier’s show last weekend (what?), so I’ll be writing about that little experience later this week. You know, after all of my scratches heal.
Buy this book!

I think it’s awesome that your kids are so understanding and are not Kevorkianing Miss Dickens just so that they could get a cute new kitten.
I love this, mostly because we did the same thing in my house waiting for our 17-year-old one-toothed cat with a crooked crotch to pass on. However, Wendell’s been gone for a few months now, and even though I miss her a lot, I’m not ready for a kitten yet.
However, that could be because I make sure not to go to the Humane Society and ogle all the other cats I wish I could take home. In due time… 😉
Cute post.
The only way I’ve found to have a kitten in the house with an elderly cat is to bring in two. If you have one kitten, it tortures the old cat to pieces. But with two, they entertain each other and generally leave the oldster alone. We tried bringing in a kitten when our old guy was twelve, within a year we brought in another kitten just to get the first one off the old guy’s back (literally). Lucky for us, the new kitten was merciless with the previous kitten and our old guy got to live out his days in relative peace.
I suspect you already know how much I love this (and adore you for doing it/writing it/etc.).
We’re currently watching my parents’ 1-year-old kitten, and while he and 15-year-old Meeko (our cat) seem to mostly have an understanding — that understanding being, Kitten, if you come near me, I will destroy you — it’s definitely not the easiest time for our sweet senior girl. I think you’re being really smart, and kind. I mean, we want to make those last few years as comfy as they can be, right? I mean, as comfy as they can be with two large and possibly insane dogs running around, anyway …
Wendi,
Just remember, We’ll always have Burbank.
Peajaye (aka Paul from Warner Bros.)
I love a good cat lady. I agree, poor Miss Dickens could not abide a young interloper. We had to put our incontinent, aged cat Harryboy down this summer, and the girls have been needling me incessantly about a replacement. Mayyyyybe Santa will bring one. Maybe.
Wait, you went to a Cat Fanciers show? That’s called burying the lead.
Maybe they’re old enough to volunteer with the kittens? Hre we have Pets and Pals volunteer options with the local humane society, which also runs a mini shelter at our local PetsMart. Kids 7 and up can volunteer with an adult, and the biggest part of “kennel assistant” is actually playing with the animals!
Great idea. We’ve talked about that, so it’s something I should look into for sure.
I can not begin to express my gratitude for making me feel normal about my stalking of pet stores with my three children. We could serioulsy spend hours there, for free.
I simply tell my children that I’m allergic to all pets except our dog so nothing else can come home with us or Mommy would have a headache all the time. Nothing scares my boys more than Mommy with a headache. I might possibly be evil when I am in pain.
Looks like your boys are super sweet to the orphan cats, they really are probably doing a great volunteer service when they play with them. Too cute.
We have one construction site stray already. So, when my kids wanted another horse ranch stray, I said NO WAY. Time to get that golden retriever you have been hating on Santa for every year since he brought you a maltese. So now we have 2 dogs and a cat and I tell them the city won’t allow us to have any more pets.
As one of those volunteers, I can tell you that it’s great for the cats to have lots of kids come and play with them. Don’t feel bad about it!
I love the feline fiesta.
I will be buying the book by Marinka, b/c I can only imagine how wonderful it would be.
Now, about the cat show post….
Oh god, I miss our Erik so much right now. He passed away 2 and a half years ago. And we can’t even get a new cat because of my husband’s allergy. I’m going to go sit in my sad corner now.
Hehe I’m sitting with a colleague’s 8-week old kitten on my lap as I type this.
I had two cats from 8 weeks old, but my husband is very allergic. I eventually retired them to my sister’s sheep farm because she needed mousers. One has disappeared (I tell myself he’s gone rogue) and the other is content to be lapcat to a 6-year old girl who ADORES him and wears him like a stole.
It’s been three years now and I still miss them 🙁
My husband is allergic to cats, but our 13 year old retriever mix is a one-dog-per-home kinda gal. She’s like Miss Dickens, but not litter box trained. Damn it.
I already bought Marinka and Paul’s book and I love the picture of you on a bag of dog food admiring your boys admiring los gatos.
We have a ranch cat, named Cheyenne (after our former foreman’s granndaughter, who probably would have dispatched it long ago if it hadn’t been named after his granddaughter). This cat has been on the ranch for about 4 years. It was obviously someone’s cat at one time, not wild, because it is very affectionate. But when it starts ‘making bread’, you better be watching for the flood… drool by the gallons. That is all the cat we need…we have another, but it is somewhat like an overstuffed toy…never moves, unless our Aussie wants to play. Then it creeps off back into the shadows.
We do a lot of that free stalkerish kind of stuff, too. We love to drive down a street near our house that looks like it is deep in the country, though it is really surrounded by neighborhoods. There are cows, deer, buffalo, donkeys and goats milling about that we just stare at and then drive off. They love it!
I will definitely check out the book!
Loved your post and let me tell you, holding off on Kevorkian-ing your cat pays off in the long run. We are enjoying our two little babies – 3 mo – who we brought home last weekend. Our dear, overweight, 13 yo cat died of heart failure (a nice, low key way to go) about a month ago. We miss him, of course, but it sure is nice to have some frisky energy in the house again. And they’re definitely keeping my 4 yo occupied!
You know I’m buying Marinka’s book and not just because I lurve her, but because there is a cat anus on the back cover and what is funnier than a cat anus? Not much, I’m telling you.
Funny, I took my kids to a cat adoption fair and it’s the reason they’ve never again asked for a cat. One of the little caged kitties leaned out her paw and THWAPPED my youngest on the head so hard that she drew blood.
And that, my friend, is why we are dog people.
I do like the idea of using your geriatric pet as a means of gauging how your children will care for you when you’re in your dotage. Hope they don’t wave sparkly cat toys in your face and try to feed you from a can.
My husband has been ranting for weeks about how after our oldest kitty passes that we will be a one cat household. That was until two stray kittens showed up on our back porch. They both have names now and their own “house” that my husband built. They are still not letting us touch them yet. Once we gain their trust it will be time to break it by taking them to the vet. to be fixed and get their shots. There has also been talk that they could come in the basement when we are knee deep in snow. Personally, I think he’ll break before we are knee deep in snow, I’ve already told him I know I will.
I’m a bit concerned about the number of your commenters who’s husbands are allergic to cats. I’m just hoping these people are not breeders passing on their inferior genes to an already weakened pool.
My last cat died 5 years ago and I so miss him, but haven’t been able to figure out how to keep my dogs out of the little box should I get a kitten. BTW- my dogs are earthers and can fit through any opening a cat could.
My friend and her husband had this cat that lived like 20 some odd years. He looked like the crypt keeper…
Have you tried giving Miss Dickens a little “pick me up”? You know the kind that Heidi Fleiss uses to help her stay awake for days on end. I hear that they are HUGE in the geriatric community these days.
Why are you and Marinka always trying to shut me out of your sister wives club because I don’t own a cat?
We made the huge mistake of getting a kitten when our other cat was about 6 or 8 years old. The last several years have been a non-stop yowl-fest, with intermittent hissing and scratching and biting. And the cats are being bastards, too.
The only good thing is the new cat is a lazy load, so the old cat, who is still quite spry, manages to out run her and leap to safety on top of bookshelves and entertainment centers.
Yeah…it wouldn’t have been fair to get a kitten since my cats are seniors and not in perfect health. So I got a peppy little dog instead. That was JUST what they needed. Ask them. They’ll tell you it’s true. Well, sure, first you DO have to find out where they’re hiding.
I can’t believe you didn’t buy Miss Dickens a flowery muumuu during one of your many trips to the pet store. ALL the ladies her age have them!
Ohhhh, I can relate. When my 19 1/2 yo deaf calico cat was doing her “death rattle” breath, my then 7-yo came to say her goodbyes. She leaned over Cally (the calico, yes, I’m clever with the names), said a quiet goodbye and then, without missing a beat, looked up at me and said, “Now, can we get a dog?”
Thank goodness Cally couldn’t hear a thing.
But, yeah, now I have a 50 pound black lab asleep on the floor next to me.
I was just going to mention how excited your kids must be about Marinka’s cat book.
Miss Dickens – great name, I must say. Even if she doesn’t move (which is a big plus in my book).
I told my son he could get another pet if he cleaned cat boxes for 6 months. He always asks what the date will be in 6 months but he only cleans it once & gives up for months.
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If I’d realized my 19-year-old confused cat was yowling because she didn’t want to miss Bingo, we could have gone down to the church hall and had some fun! And now it’s too late. Dang.
We’re always being cautioned that cats will suffocate children, but in this case you may want to be worried about the reverse. Such a cute photo.
And nice work, Marinka. I will buy one. But I want it autographed. By Nikki.