This morning I was avoiding working on something I didn’t want to work on, so I challenged myself to see how many lists I could write in under 30 minutes. What follows is a very big lesson on Quality vs. Quantity. I promise it won’t happen again.
From the People Who Gave Us Pajama Jeans, Get Ready For
Maternity Underwear Bikini!
Ripped Up Concert T-Shirt Cocktail Dress!
Hospital Gown Bridal Gown!
Reality TV Shows Based On My Neighborhood
Keeping Up with the Konfederates
16 & Driving A Nicer Car Than Me
Who Wants to Be A Millionaire So They Can Upgrade to a McMansion?
America’s Next Top Pampered Chef
The Amazing Race to Be the First Person To Report Me to the HOA
Because My Trashcans Are Still At the Curb
Survivor: PTA Budget Meeting
Cute Nicknames I’ve Given the Barking Dog Across the Street
Things I’d Rather Do Than Cook Dinner Tonight
Ask a Tax Attorney to Explain His Job
Try on Swimsuits at Wet Seal
Find Out Why My Mechanic Calls Himself “Ballman”
Investigate the Decaying Smell Under My Weird Neighbor’s Deck
Let Jared From Subway Rub Me with His Footlong
Fake Names I Used When I Was Younger
Fake Names I Use Now
Unfortunately, the 30 minutes is now up. What a shame because I was just getting ready to write some really good ones. Seriously, genius always strikes me after 31 minutes. Ask anyone.
Anyway, the funny is actually over at The Mouthy Housewives this week, so be sure to take a look. Or, if you’re a fan of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, read my recaps at The Stir where I get to talk about plastic surgery and that prince Kelsey Grammer.
And if you didn’t get my earlier post about the gym this week because of my whacko RSS feed, that’s right here. (Note: My apologies if you happen to be a prolific sweater. I’m sure you’re still a very nice person. But may I suggest you look into a Bathrobe Tuxedo the next time you work out?)
Have a great weekend!