The Bored Game
July 28th, 2009
I’m bored! Go outside.
I’m bored! Stay inside.
I’m bored! Shut the door. Or do you think I want to air condition the entire neighborhood?
I’m bored! Play with your toys.
I’m bored! Play with your brother.
I’m bored! Play with yourself. Wait—scratch that. You’re not a teenager yet.
I’m bored! Read a book.
I’m bored! Read a magazine.
I’m bored! Read this ten page letter mommy got from the IRS and figure out why they don’t consider $400 in Barry Manilow tickets to be a valid charitable contribution.
I’m bored! Clean your room.
I’m bored! Clean MY room.
I’m bored! Clean the entire 5th floor of the downtown Ramada, then bring me some of those little shampoos that smell like lilacs and happiness.
I’m bored! Solve the national housing crisis.
I’m bored! Solve the national employment crisis.
I’m bored! Solve the national Paula Abdul crisis.
I’m bored! Go swimming.
I’m bored! Go fishing.
I’m bored! Go over to the neighbor’s house and ask if your mommy can borrow a cup of Pinot Grigio and a Tylenol.
I’m bored! Enjoy it while it lasts, kid.
Entry Filed under: Uncategorized
45 Comments
Add your own1. Stuart | July 28th, 2009 at 7:21 am
Sounds like the conversations I used to have with my mother
2. jessica | July 28th, 2009 at 7:37 am
I didn’t know Phoebe was visiting you?
3. Shauna | July 28th, 2009 at 7:55 am
Wait. Are you recording the inside of MY house? Because you could be, you know.
Could school START already? I’m quickly turning into an alcoholic. Functioning, but still.
4. feefifoto | July 28th, 2009 at 8:17 am
Just added you to my reader. You can send a thank-you note to JD at I Do Things.
5. MG @ MommyGeekology.com | July 28th, 2009 at 9:49 am
LOL.
6. hokgardner | July 28th, 2009 at 9:56 am
Sounds like a typical day at our house. Ella has now learned to say, “I’m bored. What can I do that’s FUN?”
7. Candy | July 28th, 2009 at 10:15 am
as for that last line, rock on.
8. Inna | July 28th, 2009 at 11:43 am
I’m bored… can I come to your house? I’ll bring wine!
9. christy | July 28th, 2009 at 12:10 pm
Hehehe. so funny. I sort of can’t wait. Am I crazy or what? My daughter can’t really talk yet.
It was soooo nice meeting you at BlogHer!!!
10. Lynn from For Love or Funny | July 28th, 2009 at 12:13 pm
Hey, how’d my kids end up at your house??
11. donna | July 28th, 2009 at 12:17 pm
Just stopped by after coming down from my BlogHer high to say hello. Loved your keynote.
We must be connected somehow because I am in a serious relationship with Diet Coke’s younger dorky brother Coke Zero.
12. Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings | July 28th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
So glad I haven’t yet reached this point with my child…who makes toys out of garbage cans and pieces of cardboard.
13. DG at Diaryofamadbathroom | July 28th, 2009 at 2:26 pm
This is real life. I have this conversation with my daughter every day, though I am sure that I never had the mental sharpness to put her on the housing crisis. But now that you mention it, she’d probably be great at it because she’s very bossy and she has the first nickel she was ever given.
14. Margaret (Nanny Goats) | July 28th, 2009 at 2:32 pm
Ah, to be bored again. Actually, I don’t know if I could stand to be bored again. I think about bewcoming a monk standing around all day, chanting and walking, eating rice and air, and I don’t know if I could stand it. I’d go crazy. Of course, this is exactly what a clueless nonMonk thinks, and if I were a monk, I’d be on the other side of “the truth” and “the way” and all that other crap, and be blissful and content.
Stupid monks.
15. Mwa | July 28th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
I’ve also tried “leave me alone or I’m making you go for a nap”. Works every time.
Actually, in our house it’s the other way around. The kids are quite happy but I get bored.
16. Lulu and Moxley's Mom | July 28th, 2009 at 3:36 pm
I told my friend I can’t wait for the girls to be able to fully communicate so I know what they want. She maintains the best ages are between 13 and 17 since they CAN talk to you but don’t.
17. Diana | July 28th, 2009 at 4:25 pm
I’m bored! By all means, watch another full day of princess movies while mommy eats her feelings. Oh sorry, just had to add my own version.
18. the mama bird diaries | July 28th, 2009 at 6:31 pm
Boredom is truly wasted on the young.
19. Lisa Rae @ smacksy | July 28th, 2009 at 6:36 pm
My own mother (professional organizer) used to answer, “How can you be bored when your closet looks like that?” Then she would hand me a trash bag.
I wonder why I have OCD?
20. Sarah M | July 28th, 2009 at 7:07 pm
ROTF…esp at the teenager response, the wine and Tylenol (change that to Vicodin and/ or Valium)response, and the last line..just perfect.
21. Akilah Sakai | July 28th, 2009 at 7:42 pm
Haaa! “Play with yourself.”
Wendi, you sure know how to tickle my funny bones. Kids never pipe down!
22. ms picket to you | July 28th, 2009 at 7:59 pm
YOU?
Not.
Boring.
23. Katie | July 29th, 2009 at 7:26 am
Standard reply to my class of kids (ages 6-11)
“Wow. A whole room full of activities and you’re bored. Man it must SUCK to be you”
They always find something.
(Then again, they’re not MY kids and they know that I’ll willingly tell them I only have to make it through 8 hours and then I can send them home to their actual family to whine and complain.)
24. ann | July 29th, 2009 at 1:54 pm
Yeah, now you know how mommy feels. SCRAM.
25. charmaine | July 29th, 2009 at 2:45 pm
I’m bored. Drink a Margarita.
26. charmaine | July 29th, 2009 at 2:47 pm
I’m bored! Drink a Margarita.
27. Jen | July 29th, 2009 at 4:02 pm
Great post. The Barry Manilow tickets cracked me up. I can’t remember the last time I was bored. It’s a nice thought.
28. tuesday | July 29th, 2009 at 4:23 pm
Do you live in my house?
I have nothing to tell my kids when they tell me their bored, because I am usually bored too.
29. Domestic Goddess (in training) | July 29th, 2009 at 6:26 pm
Was that the first day of summer or was it an hour after school ended on the last day of school, because I am pretty sure my 10 year old and I had that same talk when she got off the bus on the last day of school!
30. Danielle | July 30th, 2009 at 6:55 am
Wendi!
I just had a chance to hear your keynote (couldn’t hear a thing backstage, what with my heart beating faster than a drum solo). You are seriously funny, woman. It was an honor to meet you!
31. red | July 30th, 2009 at 12:05 pm
I’m bored too.
I’ll bring you a bottle of wine and a game. You can drink while I trounce you at UNO.
32. Annje | July 30th, 2009 at 7:02 pm
Can’t wait for the “I’m boreds” We are still with the “whys”.
33. califmom | July 31st, 2009 at 3:04 am
Gave mine that battery-operated bunny swag. Shut them up for a while until they started bitching about it not hopping right. Whatever.
34. JD at I Do Things | July 31st, 2009 at 6:07 am
Oh, man. If your child can save the National Paula Abdul crisis, I will bow down in awe. How can kids EVER be bored? They’re kids!
35. georgie | July 31st, 2009 at 8:16 am
LMAO@Read this ten page letter mommy got from the IRS and figure out why they don’t consider $400 in Barry Manilow tickets to be a valid charitable contribution
The nerve of the IRS they are really going down hill these days
36. Beth | July 31st, 2009 at 1:44 pm
I miss those summers when I got to know what being bored was all about.
There are some students at my school (who aren’t teenagers) who play with themselves. They must be bored.
37. Carolyn Online | July 31st, 2009 at 6:59 pm
Dude that’s when you hand over the matches and say, “Have at it kid!” Kids with matches are never bored.
38. Marinka | August 1st, 2009 at 1:44 am
Bored? They must not have been reading BlogHer’09 recaps! Because those are fun!
39. madmad | August 1st, 2009 at 6:59 am
Ah, we play this game at my house, too… As usual, though, your version is better. I think I’ll cheat and copy!
40. Maria Butts | August 1st, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Use the ’starving kids in Africa’ response, usually used for picky eaters. You can also say ‘kids in Africa aren’t bored because they are so starving..I’m going to send you there on a one way ticket!’ That should shut them up.
41. vodkamom | August 2nd, 2009 at 5:58 am
that is the STORY of my summer.
42. aussiechic | August 2nd, 2009 at 7:14 am
LOL – that is great……you have got to love em eh??? Either that or hang them up on the nearest hook by the front door and go and enjoy that pinot grigio and tylenol……:)
43. Stefanie | August 2nd, 2009 at 7:57 am
I’m bore…shit the babies just woke up. Never mind.
44. Trenches of Mommyhood | August 2nd, 2009 at 1:47 pm
This is perfect(ly true).
45. Kendra | August 25th, 2009 at 7:58 am
I never thought I’d look forward to the start of school, but I can’t hear “I’m bored” one more time!
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