Archive for March, 2008

A Day In The Life Of Me, As Reported By US Weekly Magazine

Tuesday, March 4th, 2008

Holy housewife! WENDI AARONS is one busy lady! Besides raising two young sons, the married Austin, Texas stay-at-home mother, 39-ish, still vaccums her house daily and makes weekly trips to Target. How does she manage? “I don’t!” she says. “Just look at these horrible dark circles and reptilian dishpan hands! I’m one hot suburban mess, y’all!”

As Wendi does her life’s work of grocery shopping and housework, she lets Us follow her on a packed day.

6 A.M.
Rise, shine and wipe bottoms! Wendi staggers out of bed, then downs her first Diet Coke of the morning while brushing her teeth and pulling her hair into a limp, graying ponytail. No shower today!

8 A.M.
Wendi slouches into the elementary school assembly, totally rockin’ an Old Navy sweatsuit and last summer’s broken flip-flops. “Elastic waist pants are the new little black dress!” she predicts.

9 A.M.
Driving to the nearby preschool in her bird-crap covered Volvo, Wendi talks to her son JACK, 4, about how it’s never a good idea to wipe your nose on the couch. “But by this point, I’m so good at stain removal,” she tells Us, “I could probably get a job cleaning up grisly, underworld crime scenes!”

10 A.M.
Wendi folds laundry and turns on Bret Michaels: Rock of Love 2 on VH-1. While she watches, she hopes Bret remembers that every rose has its thorn. And that every contestant on a VH-1 dating show has a social disease.

12:30 P.M.
After a few exhilarating hours of dusting, Wendi grabs lunch, usually a Luna bar or something else that doesn’t require actual plates or utensils. “One day I ate 14 sticks of string cheese!” Wendi boasts. “Then two days later, I had to go see an Internist!”

3 P.M.
Swiffer time!

5 P.M.
Choosing what’s for dinner is never easy for Wendi (“I’d rather try on swimsuits!”), so tonight, she’s taking it easy and letting the kids pick out the pizza topping. (Hint: It rhymes with “sneeze”!)

7 P.M.
Bedtime for the kids! Wendi kisses the boys good-night, then heads downstairs to try out new Texas hotspot The Couch. “I’ve been waiting to go there all day!” she reports. “I hear it’s totally ultra-swank!”

8 P.M.-10 P.M.
Finally able to relax, Wendi spends the evening pursuing some of her other many interests. (Think Pinot Grigio and “American Idol”.) “Damn, it’s been a long day,” she says. “And you know what? It’s really not as glamorous as it sounds.” Good-night, Wendi!

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