The wonderfully named Buns of Strudel has tagged me with something called a meme in which I’m supposed to tell eight things about myself. I’ve seen others do this in a very thoughtful, open manner and really share themselves with the world.

Not me.

You see, rather than spend a few moments in quiet introspection in which I may actually grow as a person, I’ve decided instead to remain true to myself. And, of course, by “true to myself” I mean I’m just going to write down a few things in my usual half-assed manner, then hope it has more literary merit than a Wal-Mart circular. Eye of the tiger, baby.

Here goes:

1. I once videotaped a brain surgery under false pretenses. I’d like to now officially apologize to that particular patient for later turning the footage into a student film called, “Dr. Bob: Hell’s Neurosurgeon”.

2. Years ago, I spent the night in Howard Hughes’ old guest house that used to be right off the Vegas strip. I imagined I heard his fingernails scratching on the walls all night, but it was still better than staying at CircusCircus and imagining clowns scratching on the walls all night.

3. My favorite movie is Apocalypse Now and I find it immensely amusing to yell, “I love the smell of cat puke in the morning! Smells like…victory!”

Nobody else in my house finds this amusing.

4. My husband and I had our picture taken with George Clooney at a Hollywood party once. In the picture, George is the great looking guy in the middle. We’re the two blobs of vanilla pudding on either side who look like we’re in need of liver transplants.

5. I have an unhealthy relationship with Benadryl allergy medicine.

6. One time in Reno, my friend Megan and I finally overcame our shyness and got up on stage to sing karaoke in a contest. We thought our rendition of “Muskrat Love” was going propel us to first place, until the next act got up and sang a version of “My Girl” that got the crowd roaring.

We found out later they were three members of the original “Temptations”.

7. I am something of a savant at Pop-A-Shot basketball and am waiting for the day I can turn pro.

8. My first car was a sky-blue Nova that smelled like split pea soup when the heater was on. Also, it didn’t go in reverse. I drove it for three years until my dad sold it to a migrant farm worker for $100.00.

So that’s it. Fascinating stuff. Buy the movie rights now while you still can, people. Oh, and I think I’m now supposed to tag other people, but sadly, I’ll need to do it later as I’ve run out of time. I hear there’s a Pop-A-Shot tournament at the downtown arcade and I don’t want to be late.

Wendi Aarons